*by Pastor Carrie Graham
On the news yesterday (Sept 10), I recognized something before I realized what the story was covering:
Utah Valley University.
“Is that UVU?!” I said out loud to myself and looked closer.
One of the first dialogues I ever participated in took place there.
I remember it well. I remember all that I was learning about seeking to understand before being understood. I remember a lot of laughter with people I would never have met otherwise in my lifetime. I remember how excited we were. I remember how silly we were.
It was a strange type of dystopian effect, watching the scene set for what my mind registers as a beautiful scene of bridge building, suddenly become the opposite. People I adore gathered there to build understanding and camaraderie; now I was watching people sprint away from one another for their lives. We were building peace back then; now it is a scene of unspeakable, violent harm that killed a man and wounded a country yet further.
Here is what is predictable about the aftermath of this tragedy:
*people condemning political violence and saying how we must finally get along or bust
*people online saying extreme and troubling things that jump further into verbal -and possibly incite physical- violence
*fancy speeches about whether guns are or are not the problem
*many of us feeling like this is a problem bigger than us, and after saying some troubled prayers for Charlie Kirk’s family and for our country, we go on about our business.
What I want to encourage friends and neighbors to consider is this:
*How do I/we/you -on a daily basis- contribute to chatter, pronouncements, jokes, beliefs and behaviors that reduce a precious child of God to something even a bit less than that?
Whatever our politics, whatever our theology, whatever our values, what is one way to take very seriously the way we refer to our neighbors, the way we push forward the undermining of taking people seriously who are different than ourselves?
What is one thing you could do today, and tomorrow, and the next day, that would ease up a bit on how I/we/you make light of or even trash talk the other side, whatever side that may be?
It may seem like talk, and light years away from what a murderer can do.
But environments which allow for human reductionism (as in when we find ourselves in spaces where it is acceptable to say things that chip away at somebody’s dignity) are environments where people start to get ideas about other humans not having as much value as other humans. This is a dangerous road; we are seeing its deleterious effects more and more in the USA these days.
It is a myth that this problem exists somewhere beyond you and me. This problem is not beyond you and me. It starts with you and me.
How will we speak of and to each other? This deeply and directly influences how we then regard and treat each other. This is especially the case when we have not met face-to-face, or when we have not had to solve a problem together, share an experience together, find ourselves laughing together, find ourselves holding each other up through hard times together.
If anyone has interest in considering how to lean into embodying the kind of community we actually wish to see and be, and you’d like tips, support, help or a cheerleader, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me at carrie@thechurchlab.org. Who knows? Maybe some of the lessons I’ve learned from almost 2 decades of peacebuilding work could be of service to your situation. Or email me and let me know you want to observe or participate in an upcoming dialogue; anyone with an open heart is very welcome there. But this post isn’t intended as a commercial or a sales pitch; TCL involvement is simply one concrete example of ways you can dedicate yourself to being, and thus building, the kind of future you/we/I want for ourselves and upcoming generations.
To this end, The Church Lab‘s work, and others who do any related work, continues to grow more urgent and vital every day. I just saw a message among my own board of directors, made up of both self-identifying conservatives and liberals, sharing gratitude for their diverse team in a moment where the full body of Christ, made up of many different parts indeed, is not as often appreciated but denigrated. I am so thankful for them, and I am beyond grateful in this moment for all the present and future TCL dialoguers who are holding a very concrete Hope for our country by saying with their behaviors, “As for me, I will be a peacemaker. I will learn the reality of my neighbor, for all their similarities and differences, and I will lean into loving my neighbor as they are, and not for who I wish they would be to my convenience.”
Please nurture Hope however you can in your own world. It makes a much bigger difference than you may think. There are untold ripple effects. There are beautiful stories that emerge, just as there are tragedies prevented.
If TCL can be a part of your story in this pursuit, you can get started with us anytime. We’ll be glad to have you.